You Are Sharing Too Much
When someone is unusually courteous or kinder than what you’re used to, there’s a tendency to overshare. Often, this leads to regret. Every time you share something, you’re choosing to make yourself vulnerable — and that vulnerability may feel uncomfortable a few days later. Vulnerability is your most honest, raw self. Before revealing even a part of it, pause and ask why you’re doing it.
The urge to overshare usually stems from a need for validation. If you were never told you were good enough, you may subconsciously chase that affirmation through conversations. Some boast about themselves just to hear a reassuring “attaboy.” You share too much because you want people to think highly of you. Oversharing also signals a lack of conversational skill — you don’t know how to hold a dialogue without turning it into your life story.
The problem with oversharing — or sharing too soon — is that the other person might not care about you in the way you expect. They may not be as mindful of your emotions as you’d like. Would you be okay if they mocked you behind your back, ignored your feelings, or even used your words against you? Most people consume information to reuse it elsewhere. Few genuinely care; such people are rare.
So next time someone describes a situation similar to yours, resist the urge to jump in — unless what you share reveals nothing deeply personal. Before you tell a story from your life, ask yourself one question: Is this a good story, or am I just seeking validation? If it’s the latter, follow up with another: Is this the right person whose approval would even matter?