The Tyranny Of Social Benchmarks
We cannot measure our progress unless we have a reference point. Progress is, after all, a transition from one state to another. But the only way to define that earlier state is by anchoring it to something fixed. A reliable way to measure progress is through time spent and milestones achieved. What were you doing five years ago compared to today? How do you stand relative to your peers in society? Social benchmarks therefore function as reference points against which we evaluate all forms of progress.
From a societal perspective, it is efficient to measure a community’s past condition against its present one. If the change is positive, we call it progress. But what happens when we start applying this same benchmark to our own lives? Our sense of progress becomes distorted. This can easily breed an enduring sense of inadequacy. It can trigger moral crises in people who suddenly realise that certain goals are no longer attainable for them.
The problem with measuring everyone by the same yardstick is that it produces the same kind of person. We risk becoming identical—sharing the same biases, the same ideology, the same interests, the same frustrations. How can that lead society forward? The point of progress is evolution and elevation, but if all remain the same, there is no evolution—only stagnation and eventual collapse.
People fall into severe mental crises, develop illnesses, and despair because they believe they “missed the boat” and ruined their lives. They believe this because they were handed a social benchmark against which to measure themselves. And by that benchmark, failure becomes a crime. That is how creativity and genius are extinguished. Perhaps a true social benchmark should not be social at all if we genuinely aim for progress. It should be individual. When each individual progresses, society progresses alongside them.
And an individual can progress only when they evolve, which they cannot do unless they revise their reference point—their personal benchmark. People must use their own lives as a valid frame of comparison. What were they doing a few years ago? Have they moved beyond that point? If the movement is forward, it is progress. What they aspired to and what they achieved should be the only true metric.
The beauty of this approach is that it does not criminalise failure; it nurtures it. Missing the benchmark does not trouble you because it is your benchmark. You can begin again today and meet yourself five years later. You are still enforcing feedback, still carrying the burden of progress, but this time it is not imposed by society. It is aligned with your own pace, your own trajectory—making it truly yours and genuinely relevant.
The goal was never to abandon progress or descend into nihilism, but to recalibrate the north star. The benchmarks must be your own, not bestowed upon you by society. The true aim is to remain in motion; the speed is secondary.