The Tiger That Isn't There
Anxiety is walking into a dark room and seeing a tiger. It's not there. It cannot be there, but that is the effect an anxious person experiences. They feel everything is falling apart. They want to stop that, which feels like the right thing to do. But everything is not falling apart. It only appears so to them.
They want to control how every action of theirs, as well as others', turns out. They want to influence the outcome. They plan it in their mind and then attempt to control it by managing every variable involved. Soon their systems are overwhelmed and they have no framework for dealing with this force. Everything feels daunting.
The clue lies in the compulsion to control the outcome. If you are constantly stressed, inspect whether you are trying to dictate how everything turns out in the end. You can control only a limited number of things in life. Everything else depends on how everyone else does their part. When you try to control the outcome, you are effectively trying to exert dominion over other people's minds and lives.
This is a tremendously exhausting pursuit, and you can see how futile it is too. You have to draw a line in your head: you cannot control everything. You are not meant to control everything. Sure, you can try to force the outcome. You might even succeed on one or two occasions, but it will eventually bring failure and considerable suffering.
This is the wrong kind of suffering, because it carries no transformation, only one message: you cannot control the outcome. You will have to accept that your control is limited regardless. You might as well accept it early and spare yourself the useless suffering.
The better alternative is to look at everything as a puzzle to be solved. Think from the place of an ideal outcome. Ask what is required of you to reach it. If it is within your control, build systems that consistently produce that outcome. If it is not within your control, the ideal outcome is a myth. And you cannot chase a myth.