Love and Consequences
When the parents go through tough times, they ensure their children don’t. Before the child comes into the world, the parents have done their post-mortem of the past. They are now equipped with a plan to never let it happen. So they work hard on building a life for their children where tough times cannot enter.
Being the one who grew up in challenging times, the father can spot a challenge from miles away and take care of it before the child can think of it.
That’s what happened to Siddhartha.
He was so unaware of the troubles of the world that when he finally saw a dead body passing through he was shocked. Then he witnessed the miseries of the world and decided to leave the kingdom permanently. That’s how we got Gautam Buddha. The epitome of enlightenment. Buddha’s father did the same. You know where I am getting at.
I am not arguing that it’s wrong. I am saying that it has some consequences that we don’t consider. When a child doesn’t go through turbulence he is not equipped with the tools to deal with them. We are all the product of our struggles. The more we struggle and come out of struggle the stronger we become.
This is maturity.
Because now you realize the world doesn’t operate on what you were taught throughout your life. This is the cold hard truth. The world isn’t fair and sooner or later your child is going to face it. Another truth is you cannot be everywhere for your child You have every right to love. As much as you want to. You also must equip your child with the tools to prosper in the world.
Ever seen the children of billionaires? They are often spoiled brats. Why is that? They think they deserve the happiness or any material goods they like. Even when happiness comes at the cost of someone else’s. Nobody showed them they had to earn their place in the world. So, they never bothered to learn it.
The same goes for the poor. They were taught that for their poverty someone has to be blamed. Life can be unfair. Such children cultivate angst against the world. This angst turns into bitterness. The bitterness clouds their judgment.
When they lose judgment they also lose their ability to reflect upon their actions.
Irresponsibility and recklessness creep in. When you are convinced that the world owes you why would you be aware enough of your surroundings and take action?
No responsibility and no self-awareness lead to no sense of duty and purpose. It’s not the love. It’s what you deprived them of when you loved them. Just like you cannot deprive them of education and material goods, you cannot deprive them of the value system required to lead a good life. The consequences of love or lack of love are not immediate but certain.
Human beings are emotional beings and love is the most potent weapon of all to rule those emotions.